Let Father O' Twosecretkids give you absolution.
Now simply place your forehead against your computer screen to receive absolution.
God the Father of mercies has reconciled the cyberworld to Himself through the death and resurrection of Alfie Thomson of 5 Norwood Drive, Elmsford, and has poured forth the Holy Spirit for the forgiveness of sins. May He grant you pardon and peace through the Ministry of Sound. And I absolve you from your sins in the name of the Father, the Son, and the Internet.
Now send
$50 in cash only to Michael O'Shyster, 335, Ninth Avenue, Brooklyn.
REMEMBER YOUR ABSOLUTION DOES NOT COUNT IF
YOU FAIL TO SEND THE MONEY
YOU WILL BE DAMNED AND COULD SPEND ETERNITY IN HELL.
DON'T TAKE THE RISK, SEND THE CASH RIGHT NOW.
Hey, people of Nebraska, just watch out which social clubs you join. You're in grave danger of excommunication. Click here for more details
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